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The Core First Contact Pt 1


I remember a time when I was meditating on nothing in particular, when I first entered, or rather stumbled into this awareness. I first felt the freedom of nothingness; for there was literally no-thing to behold; no pictures, no thoughts, and no emotions, therefore I felt no burden; neither did I feel any obligation or urgency to do, say or be anything. I was perfect the way I was in that moment, yet at the same time I felt that I could be anything, or do anything.


Once I noticed this state of being, that can only be described as detached bliss; I began to be taken away to different places at the speed of thought.


I recall seeing cities that I had never before seen. I knew that I had no prior knowledge of or any frame of reference for these places; these cities, to my knowledge were places that did not exist on earth.


It seems that in the moment that I noticed these realms, realizing that they were unfamiliar, my awareness shifted once more, and the environments were replaced with various sceneries which I could recognize from films and photographs.


I recall standing before a very modern looking building, which resembled a ship's sail, I could see the structure as well as the surrounding grounds.

Again, once I noticed where I was, my awareness shifted and then I was seeing a panoramic view of an expansive city, which I assumed existed somewhere in the east coast of the United States because it had Victorian like architecture.

It looked to me like the scenes of Philadelphia that I had seen on television in certain films.



The scene continued to change into other cities which I recognised more and more. I eventually saw monuments from places that I had in fact visited before such as the River Walk in San Antonio Texas, the mountains and canyons from my native state New Mexico, then very familiar sites around my home town of Roswell New Mexico, the city of Roswell itself, my neighbourhood, my parent's home, my bedroom, and finally I woke out of the meditation.


At first I didn't know what to make of any of this experience. The only thing I knew was that I had no direct intention to see anything in this particular meditation. Come to think of it, this was the first time in my life that I decided to meditate on nothing. Almost immediately I realized that nothing is in fact something.


I recalled learning somewhere (probably in high school) that nature abhors a vacuum. Although I work under the assumption that this is so, I feel that it is more a case of vacuums existing so they can be filled.


My life at that time, leading up to this moment of spiritual break-through, for all intents and purposes had been nothing but a huge, all consuming vacuum. I was stuck in a "rut" both professionally and personally.


This was somewhere near my twenty-third birthday, although I am unsure as to the exact time.


Sadly, I was still living at home with my parents after I would say my third attempt at going to college, in an effort to do "something with my life".


I was an unsigned recording artist trying desperately to get my "big break", which was my major aspiration and what I thought was my life's purpose.



I had (and still have) specialised training in the area of music; namely voice and piano, and I still compose music from time to time, so this was no mere phase or pipe dream; if anything, education helped me to discover this aptitude and cultivate it into what really in theory should have been at least a decent career in the music industry.


During this time I went through disappointment after disappointment every time I tried to make this dream a reality. I simply had no connection to my inner guidance at this time. I could not see objectively, and I could not tell a real opportunity from a major scam, although I was doing everything that I could both practically and spiritually to find answers.



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